Bancuri Netraduse, ..adica in Engleza |
Bine ati venit ca musafir! ( Logare | Inregistrare )
Bancuri Netraduse, ..adica in Engleza |
21 Jun 2003, 01:35 PM
Mesaj
#1
|
|
Vornic Grup: EmailInvalid Mesaje: 335 Inscris: 21 June 03 Forumist Nr.: 398 |
Waking up after a restless night, the wife turned to her husband and frowned. "I can't believe it! All night long you kept cursing me in your sleep!"
The husband replied, "Who was sleeping?" -------------------- |
|
|
1 Jul 2003, 07:13 AM
Mesaj
#2
|
|
Vornic Grup: EmailInvalid Mesaje: 335 Inscris: 21 June 03 Forumist Nr.: 398 |
Once upon a time, there was a female brain cell which, by mistake,
happened to end up in a man's head. She looked around nervously, but it was all empty and quiet. "Hello?" she cried...but no answer. "Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.... Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled: "HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?" Then she heard a voice from far, far away ... "Hellooooo - we're all down here...." --------------------------------------------------- The Female Prayer Before I lay me down to sleep, pray for a man who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, When he says he'll call, he won't wait weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, he won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to the end, And never attempt to hit on my friend. And as I kneel and pray by my bed... I look at the creep you sent me instead. Amen. The Male Prayer I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge Tits who owns a liquor store. Amen -------------------------------------------- Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing. One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get horny?" The other replies, "Oh sure I do." The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver." After a few moments, the first asks, "Who drives you to the beach?" ************************* Ethel and Mabel, two elderly widows, were watching the folks go by from their park bench. Ethel said, "You know, Mabel, I've been reading this 'Sex and Marriage' book and all they talk about is 'mutual orgasm'. 'Mutual orgasm' here and mutual orgasm' there - that's all they talk about. Tell me, Mabel, when your husband was alive, did you two ever have mutual orgasm?" Mabel thought for a long while. Finally, she shook her head and said, "No, I think we had State Farm." *********************************** Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece. The third old lady remarked, "I can't hear a word you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about." -------------------- |
|
|
Versiune Text-Only | Data este acum: 17 June 2024 - 01:57 AM |